A family
from Hull is suing a local holiday park, as their holiday was “ruined by the noise
of the wind on the caravan roof.” They claim they “didn’t sleep a wink” during
their weekend stay.
Joe a
father of 3 who told us he has never seen an episode of Games Of Thrones, and surprisingly, doesn’t do cross fit (we only assume this as he didn’t immediately
tell us upon our arrival) said “The wind was ridiculous, who decides to put a holiday
camp near the sea were everyone knows it will be windier?”
The irony
of everyone knowing that it is windier near the sea and then still going on
holiday there seemed to be lost on Joe.
“The wind was that bad I couldn’t
even hear the sound of my own farts.”
We
contacted the holiday park in question and the responded to Joe’s claim about
his holiday being ruined.
They said “we are
aware of a gentleman’s dissatisfaction with his stay recently due to it being a
bit windy. We had received no complaints from the person in question whilst he
was staying here with us. The first we are hearing of an impending lawsuit is through this very
newspaper. Sadly, as much as we would like to have special weather producing
powers, we don’t and we cannot be held accountable for said weather.”
We were
unable to get a photo of Joe and his family today due to Joe currently being
enrolled in a “Get your compo face newspaper ready in seconds” course at the
local college. “I’m not prepared to break the compo face oath I took before I
started this course, I still have 3 lessons left!” Joe told us.
This
reporter can tell you though, the course is clearly working its magic so far,
Joe had a perfect arms folded stance. He does however need to work on his pet
lip and sad eyes.
Joe’s wife,
Alix, said that she cannot wait to spend the compensation on a Jacuzzi for
their back garden and some new sandals for the dog.
Joe plans
to get in contact with his solicitor this week to begin legal proceedings against
the holiday park.
I think you
better call Saul, Joe.
Never want to miss a post? Sign up here!
No comments:
Post a Comment